Christmas Wrapped

Last year, I planned and hosted a New Year’s Eve party with a friend. I had strep during the holidays and recovered just in time to host the party and then pick up Satan, our second dog. New Year’s resolution: have a hangover free New Year’s Day next year.

I did DIY gift labels last year as well as DIY invites for the New Year’s party. If there’s one thing I learned last year: I’m not doing DIY this year. Also, no one even looked at the gift tags.

I’m not quite sure that we’ll do a full–on party this year, but we plan on hosting people for dinners and we plan on attending the 17 to 30 family parties that happen between Thanksgiving and New Year’s.

I’ve always been a last–minute planner and gift giver. Sure, there are 364 days before Christmas. Sure, it happens on the same day EVERY YEAR. But I don’t work in terms of days or weeks. Usually on December 23rd I’ll sneak out in a panic and shop for everybody on my list. Which explains why Jon gets socks. Or a package of white T–shirts. This is why we’ve gone to approved item lists. Jon sends me his list, with links to where I can buy his list, and I tell him to visit Etsy.com.

Leta is a little older this year, so this holiday season we’re doing more that involves her. She’s been curious as to where exactly Christmas falls on the calendar, but since she’s still fuzzy on the concept of dates I’ve told her that it’s after both Halloween and a day called Thanksgiving when we eat food she wouldn’t touch with a ten–foot stick.

This year Jon and I probably won’t exchange gifts. Leta will still receive a somewhat smaller haul, but given the state of things we might not need some of the things we’d likely get for each other. Like another gadget (with cables) or another hippo figurine. Even though I’m thinking about a third dog, I doubt this is the year that is going to happen.

This year we’re going to try something different for a change and simplify everything for Christmas. This means I’ll give Jon a list of cute accessories, and he’ll give me his list of gadgets that I will point out we don’t need.

I figure if I give him my list before Thanksgiving, he can capitalize on the sales, which will be more important this year than in years past.

A few of the items (I hope you read this, Jon):

Isaac Mizrahi for Target Computer Tote:

Bedding (because I’m pregnant and tired, and we all know how much I like to nap):

A maternity cocktail dress for New Year’s Eve:

A pair of new sneakers to make room for my swollen ankles:

And a pair of stylish sweat pants that won’t show just how many bags of chips I’ve been eating:

I’ve known my husband for over a decade, but he’s still a huge challenge to shop for because he wants things that are expensive (new computer, perhaps a hybrid crossover vehicle) or outside the realm that I am comfortable buying. Like this one from his list the past three years: THX certified receiver/amp.

In years past I’ve purchased clothing for him, and this has been met with varying degrees of success. This year, he swears he’s submitting a list, but I’m not holding my breath. Last year’s list included a $1.2 million dollar dream car. I’m still bitter about that one.

It’s not just my husband who is difficult. I have a father and a step-father to consider. There are only so many Clint Eastwood movies to give them, so I usually opt for a gift card.

This year I’m planning on buying gadgets exclusively for my husband because these items always elicit a giddy response. For instance, I’m considering this handsfree bluetooth speaker that will help him comply with all hands-free driving laws:

While searching for that I found several other things my little gadget freak might enjoy. Like this cute USB hub:

This past summer he tried to be a better grill master, and since he was always taking his phone out to time his turns of the meat, I’m thinking this might be more helpful than getting his greasy hands on his phone:

The final gift that I’d like to get would be this dog tracking GPS:

Once again I’ve put off my final shopping until now. Literally. Right now. I’m about to head out to pick up a few small things for Jon, and I can guarantee that I will make at least one shopping trip early next week. Christmas shopping is an assignment, and like every deadline I avoid it until it was due yesterday. I’ll have Jon tell you about that one time I didn’t finish a presentation until the hour before I gave it, and because I hadn’t printed out my notes beforehand we had to pay over $40 to rent a computer. He thinks my procrastination is causing wasteful spending. I like to call it “incidentals.”

This year, I wanted to be more proactive, better prepared and more price savvy in my shopping, but I’ve failed miserably. Instead of taking the time to get or make  somebody a really nice, throughtful gift, they are getting gift cards and awkwardly intimate hugs.

Jon gave me his list, but since it didn’t include this I’m just going to go ahead and throw one in as a surprise extra. Being pregnant means NO TOUCHING, so he’s going to need options, and our dog already sleeps on the couch.

Leta is not going to get anything related to or branded Hannah Montana. She’s just starting to notice, thanks to her evil older cousins. I’m fine to have another few princess-based holidays, although I’m pretty sure this may be one of the last ones where the over riding theme is PINK PINK PINK. Recently we took her to a toy store to get an idea of what she wants, and I’m not kidding, she panicked because she didn’t see “the pink aisle.” Someone please assure me that she will graduate to other colors, preferably one that is not neon.

None of this is because I’m a soot-covered grinch, it’s just that I don’t like to shop. And then when I do I always wait until the only things left are a few pine-scented candles in the dollar bin.