Christmas Wrapped

I am so not a planner by nature. Not by a longshot. But after I had my fourth child and realized my life would never again be a calm, serene, non–chaotic place, I realized very quickly that I’d better get organized about a few key areas in my life…or things could quickly spiral downhill.

Christmas shopping is one category on which I’ve successfully maintained a tight rein over the past years––unlike my laundry situation and my kitchen junk drawers, which I’ve about determined are hopeless. I’m not sure why getting control of Christmas was so important to me; I’m sure it’s partly because I really want the focus of the holiday season to be family, friends, nostalgia, tradition, and the meaning of the holiday itself–––not freaking out and running to the mall every couple of days because OH MY GOSH, I forgot to get Aunt Sally’s mikman’s present! Christmas is RUINED! I want my kids to enjoy Christmas, to remember it fondly, and not associate the holiday with a frenzied mother whose hair looks like she stuck her finger in a socket.

It’s also important to me that Christmas not be about consumerism and materialism, even though it’s pretty hard not to spiral into that trap without trying. Growing up, I had a friend who would call me and complain every Christmas afternoon that “her parents didn’t get her anything good.” And later, when I examined her stash, my mouth would fall open–––watches, designer purses, clothes. It made an impression, even then. I knew that wasn’t what Christmas should be about.

Except for the designer purse. I’d never turn down one of those.

So now, I begin Christmas shopping in October, which is two months earlier than I ever thought about preparing for Christmas when I was single and without kids. Starting early, for me, ensures that I won’t be scurrying around like a maniac at the last minute, AND that I won’t put myself in a position to spend way more on gifts than I would otherwise, which invariably happens if I wait ‘til the week of Christmas to shop.

Most everyone on my list, with the exception of my kids, gets one gift, so knocking out the individual gifts is pretty simple. But when it comes to the kids’ Christmas presents, I had to come up with some framework, some organized approach, or the number of presents quickly mushroomed into a random mish–mash of grotesque material excess.

Here’s what I came up with.
I have three categories of gifts for my kids:

• Something they want
• Something they need
• A book

My self–imposed rule is this: I have to get something from all three categories before starting over and repeating the process. So, say I decided to get each of my kids three gifts this year. I’d have to get one gift from each of the three categories. If I decided to get them six gifts each, I’d have to have two from each category, etc.

I’ll use my oldest daughter to demonstrate how this list might translate to real–life gifts:

• Something she wants: A locket. Don’t ask me why. She must’ve read about one in a book somewhere.
• Something she needs: A new pair of spurs. She’s outgrown hers, and I have my eye on a new pair with turquoise stones.
• A book: I found an incredible Dorling–Kindersley reference book about birds, which is full of thousands of gorgeous photos. She’s into birds these days.

So there we go! A piece of jewelry, a pair of spurs, and a thick reference book about birds. I feel good about that combo. The jewelry is something that’ll make her happy–––it’s a memorable gift. The spurs are something we would have had to buy anyway, so to conceal it as a Christmas gift kills two birds with one stone. And the book, while educational, is colorful and substantial.
I generally repeat the 3–category revolution once again, resulting in six (or so) gifts for each kid: a couple of “exciting” things they’ll like, a couple of things they need, and a couple of new books.

It results in a nice Christmas. It’s not necessarily the kind of Christmas that’ll bust any records in terms of lavish goods. But it’s the kind of Christmas I always feel good about.

Okay, so I’m not a clinical agoraphobe; I just play one on TV. But the “older” I get (I’ll be forty this year), the less tolerant I am of crowds, lines, and trying to weave a shopping cart around a store packed with people. Living in the country for over a decade has probably only exacerbated my inability to psychologically handle retail crowds, so each Christmas I have to really plan carefully to avoid having a total meltdown. Because a total meltdown, for me, results not in my making a scene or crying in the middle of a retail establishment (though wouldn’t that be funny!), but leaving my cart at the end of Aisle Nine and abandoning ship, totally empty-handed. Don’t laugh—it’s happened before. More than once.

I live an hour and a half from Christmas shopping, so I’m not able to “run out and do a little” when the time is right. As such, I set aside two days—one in October, one in November—when I rise very, very early and drive to the big city, arriving at the stores as early as I can. In some cases, if it’s a large store that’s open 24 hours, I’m not afraid to start shopping before 6:00 a.m. If they open at 7:00, I’m right there by the door. If it’s a high-end store that doesn’t open ‘til 10:00, my nose is pressed against the window at 9:58, just in case the manager’s clock is two minutes fast. I want in that door the second the store opens for business!

Early morning shopping is blissful: You can pick up coffee on the way, and sip it as you shop. The employees of the store have puffy eyes, but a nice early-morning spring to their step. Any shoppers—if any—that are in the store are in exercise gear and have their hair in ponytails or under baseball caps, and everyone has that just-rolled-out-of-bed-and-splashed-water-on-my-face dewiness about them. Plus, there’s a curious camaraderie among shoppers who will arrive at a store just after sunlight; I swear, fellow shoppers and I have exchanged knowing winks before.

But most of all, the shopping itself is a complete pleasure. There’s no negotiating the aisles, trying to avoid running over anyone’s heels. You can browse every aisle in the store, unhurried, if you want, carefully considering everyone on your Christmas list and putting all the thought you need into each and every purchase.

And finally, when you see the growing stream of shoppers trickling into the store just as you’re wheeling your sacks full of presents to the car, you can sigh happily. The day hasn’t even really begun, and you’ve just taken a huge bite out of your Christmas list. And you can even go pick up another cappuccino on your way home.

Talk about beating the system.

I’ve been steadily doing my Christmas shopping, and am happy with some little nuggets I’ve found while shopping online. My list is slowly dwindling, and I’m feeling the nice holiday buzz that comes from knowing I won’t have to rush around like a madwoman for the next 30 days.

My boy loves sharks and is obsessed with Jaws, which makes perfect sense on a cattle ranch, don’t you think? He’s going to love this shark-themed “archeological” dig, which will eventually unearth a huge shark jaw and make a total mess of my kitchen floor…but who’s counting?

Oh, man. Can anyone guess who this is? It’s Goliath, which my baby (well, he’s four) is going to love since he’s seriously obsessed with the David and Goliath tale from the big book. An old testament action figure? How cool is THAT? But…is Goliath actually…smiling? He never struck me as the smiling type.

My nine-year-old daughter is neat, tidy, and loves nothing more than to have a project that requires her to use her hands in some creative way. She also meticulously marks days off the This scrapbooking kit will allow her to create her own 18-month calendar. This’ll keep her out of trouble for at least a couple of weeks!

Finally, for my oldest child, my firstborn, my eleven-year-old girl, who’s not only 5’6” and already wears a larger shoe size than me, but who’s also gone from pink-loving little girl to discriminating sophisticate (well, sorta) overnight, there’s this awesome bedding:

How awesome can bedding get, I ask you?

I’m thinking I could do all the kids’ bedrooms in this theme.

Think my boys would go for it?

Nah. I didn’t think so.

I hate public speaking. I love throwing parties. I have a friend who would speak in front of a crowd of angry cougars happily and she’d win them over, but she hates throwing parties. The thing these have in common is the only way either one gets easier is doing it a bunch of times.

Each year my neighborhood hosts a Progressive Dinner at the holidays. A Progressive Dinner is a nice way to celebrate the holidays with your neighbors without putting the job of having a neighborhood party on one host. Some people sign up to host a course of the meal: appetizers, soup, salad, main dish and dessert. The rest of the people volunteer to bring the food, except for the main dish, that is most easily made at the host’s house. Last year my husband and I offered our house up for the main dish and dessert part of the meal.

 

Decide what you want the party to look like.

The nicest thing about planning a holiday party is that we always want our house to be decorated for the holidays anyway. This means we don’t have to go above and beyond what our house would normally look like for the holiday to get it ready for the party, we also don’t have the hassle of putting up decorations for just one night.

 

Be Flexible About Space

My house is laid out with a large kitchen and dining area that are open to each other. For 6-8 people it’s plenty of room for dining, but for 24 people it wouldn’t work. Unless we were hosting a pie eating contest and no one needed to use their hands at the table.

Next to our dining room is a larger living room where we don’t have a lot of furniture, we moved last year from a much smaller space, making it easy to transform the room into a dining room.

With borrowed long banquet tables we were able to create a long dining table with our Christmas tree, a crackling fire and decorated mantel as a back drop for the meal. For no extra money.

We moved our living room sofa into the dining area of our kitchen, creating a great lounge area for chatting and mingling, since guest always congregate in the kitchen anyway.

 

To Save Money, Aim For ‘Simply Elegant’

To decorate I didn’t want to spend a lot of money on extra decorations and the best way I know to do this, and make it look beautiful, is to keep everything very simple.

I borrowed three long white tablecloths from a neighbor and purchased four low glass vases to put on the tables.

Then, while out getting food for the party, I found white hydrangeas. In December! I would’ve rather had a bright color bloom, but they were $10 for 2 stems with 4 big bunches of blooms. I ended up buying two packs, each pack filled two of my vases.

So, to add color, while still paying the price that made sense for this party, I added cranberries to the water in the vases. This added color and was more than cheap because I’d bought these cranberries at Thanksgiving and didn’t use them all. Even if you don’t think ahead, a pack of cranberries is around $1.75 at the market during the fall/winter season.

We rented plates and flatware in white and the result, even with the cranberries was still a little, well, white.

I also found a roll of red ribbon with my christmas stuff I’d bought on clearance the year before. I used it to create a thin runner down the all white table. On top of the runner we used all the votive holders, around 20, we had left from our wedding reception 10 years ago.

We ended up with a great looking table for around $25.

This is the table all set for the party with the rest of our holiday decorations. You should definitely move here.

The best way to throw a party is to remember everything doesn’t have to be perfect. Nothing kills a party faster than a stressed out host. My mantra is “Whatever gets done is what gets done.” After that? A cocktail and enjoy the night. 

 

Last year, I planned and hosted a New Year’s Eve party with a friend. I had strep during the holidays and recovered just in time to host the party and then pick up Satan, our second dog. New Year’s resolution: have a hangover free New Year’s Day next year.

I did DIY gift labels last year as well as DIY invites for the New Year’s party. If there’s one thing I learned last year: I’m not doing DIY this year. Also, no one even looked at the gift tags.

I’m not quite sure that we’ll do a full–on party this year, but we plan on hosting people for dinners and we plan on attending the 17 to 30 family parties that happen between Thanksgiving and New Year’s.

I’ve always been a last–minute planner and gift giver. Sure, there are 364 days before Christmas. Sure, it happens on the same day EVERY YEAR. But I don’t work in terms of days or weeks. Usually on December 23rd I’ll sneak out in a panic and shop for everybody on my list. Which explains why Jon gets socks. Or a package of white T–shirts. This is why we’ve gone to approved item lists. Jon sends me his list, with links to where I can buy his list, and I tell him to visit Etsy.com.

Leta is a little older this year, so this holiday season we’re doing more that involves her. She’s been curious as to where exactly Christmas falls on the calendar, but since she’s still fuzzy on the concept of dates I’ve told her that it’s after both Halloween and a day called Thanksgiving when we eat food she wouldn’t touch with a ten–foot stick.

This year Jon and I probably won’t exchange gifts. Leta will still receive a somewhat smaller haul, but given the state of things we might not need some of the things we’d likely get for each other. Like another gadget (with cables) or another hippo figurine. Even though I’m thinking about a third dog, I doubt this is the year that is going to happen.